Well, as usual. A lot a lot a lot of things happenED. Each and single day, Wen sure have mood swing and all.
Everyday for me is the same, the hurting feeling always with me. No matter what.
Conversation with XW.
Wen: Its too late already. I have already GAVE UP!
XW : Ya, I know. Now dan .... Realized.
Wen: Dan how? I've tried also. May be .... Say,: WEN CHANGED ALREADY LA.
Wen: But WEN STILL ME. IM like that, don't like to explain so much.
(no use explaining while others already have a concept about you in their mind.)
XW : Ya I know.
XW : Haix. Why things turn out to be like that?
Wen: Well, people will grow up. Thinking will change and all.
XW : Ya, I agree.
After this conversation. When XW went to bed. I didn't close the conversation's window yet. Was Scrolling up and read all over again.
Keep reading and I found out that, why should I be in this state.
I should have just leave it. Its not that I never TRY. I DID. Like what my MUM told me.
"If you have already tried your best, even when the thing didn't turn out to the way you expect. Accept it. No regret because you have already TRY."
I accept the out come. I TRIED MY BEST.
I don't know whether I've change or not.
I learn a lot of things during this few days.
1. People wont care about your feeling. When they think that you are NOT NEEDED.
2. People will want lots of thing during the GROWING UP period.
3. People are SELFISH. That's one of the MAN-KIND.
4. People are BIAS. *I know this when IM in secondary school. I still remember is SAMANTHA told me (but I want to be fair)
5. Accept what you have and what you don't want.
Last Friday, got Lifen's present. Went to Mac. Wanted to drink Milkshake. But that MAC don't have.
Dan Adrian, Andy, Aileen and Ahwen(wanna to "A" people also) walked all the way to the Interchange's Mac.
Bought Banana, Strawberry and vanilla milkshake.
At first, I don't like the taste of Banana milkshake. The other As wanna try. So hand it over to them. And they said ITS NICE WANT.
"It reminds me about the Childhood sweet that I love to eat, said ADRIAN"
"Ya lor Ya lor, that ............................, right?" said ANDY
Dan I took it back, drink again. Eh, quite nice leis.
(cos ppl snatch already dan find it nice)
"Eeyer, you say not nice what" the 2 guys.
And they run away with my BANANAMILKSHAKE.
Chasing and playing at interchange.
At the moment of time, everything also don't care. We glad to have such good friends too.
nothing to regret la.
On the same bus as Aileen, Adrian and KoonJi(my primary school friend till now)
Was talking and suddenly KoonJi asked me.
KoonJi: Wen, you didn't realized you have changed a lot during the .......... meh?
Wen : Ya, I know. I changed a lot because of............. mah. I was angry dan.
KoonJi: But why you don't wanna let ............ do the job?
(The feeling of my heart, don't know how to express it into words, how come even KoonJi also think of me this way?!)
Wen : No, you know why anot..............(explaining)
KoonJi: Orh. See now dan I know. You didn't say out who will know sia.
(Again, QIUWEN don't like to keep explaining herself.)
The whole night, was unable to sleep. The problem keeping turning in my mind.
Gonna be 18 in just a month and few more days time.
wasn't as happy and excited like before.
I keep saying.
I GAVE UP.
I feel I "IS" lousy.
I cant handle things properly.
Everything is not what I think.
It isn't EASY!
Graduated from Holy Innocents'High School, I tot everything will be so branded new that I cant even accept what gonna happen to me. NEW SCHOOL NEW FRIENDS.
Just received a call from WQ about the HARMONY CONCERT this coming Friday and Farewell dinner for Mr Kang and Mr Jamil. Suddenly, I really miss secondary school life. It may have a lot of CHILDISH act happen as and when. But the accompany I got, was so damn warming. Was arranged to sit in between 2 guys. Have lotsa fun and all. WQ will always be the one to make me laugh and all. Still remember, I always sleep during Chinese lesson, cos IM YE MAO ZI. The 2 guys sure scold me before letting me to sleep in PEACE. Copying test during the days was fun. In our group, some damn smart in maths, Chinese or English. In the group, GIRLS are well protected by the guys. The heart warming situation: WEI, BU YAO BULLY WO MEI MEI HOR! I really miss those day.
That was the time.
And NOW
ITS PIZZA GROUP